The Chronicles of SMARMIA

So, in the spirit of Narnia - I thought I would rename all of seven books in a way that might apply in present day Shangri La. I'm going to transition these children's classics from fantasy to adult contemporary drug store lit (some would argue these are one in the same - but that's neither here nor there) . Here are the original titles - their new names - and a brief synopsis of each new story in:

~ The Chronicles of Smarmia ~

1) The Magician's Nephew - The Politician's Curfew
- A coming of age story about an 'Arthur-esqe' young man running for Comptroller who is forced by his beautiful campaign manager to stay in after 11pm in order to curb his partying ways. A love affair inevitably ensues.
2) The Lion, the Witch and The Wardrobe - The Lyin', the Rich, and The Bathrobe
- A tear-jerker, coming of age tale about a 'Hefner' like man who is encouraged by his playmate to curb his partying ways. A love affair inevitably ensues.
3) The Horse and His Boy - The Whore and Her Goy
- A riveting, coming of age tale about a prostitute and her non-Jewish John who tries to curb her partying ways. A love affair (and a VD) inevitably ensues.
4) Price Caspian – Princess…. Ahhhh, I’m STUCK with this one…. Perhaps I will edit later…. (i will take suggestions)
5) The Voyage of the Dawn Treader - The Voyage of the Prawn Shredder
- A touching, coming of age journey about a 3 star chef who’s crustacean processing machine revolutionizes the cooking industry across America. A love affair (and food poisoning) inevitably ensues.
6) The Silver Chair - The (First) Silver Hair
- A nail biting – coming of age (for real this time) story about a young professional hockey player discovering his first gray hair. Upon entering a salon to get a dye job, he meets a beautiful stylist – A love affair (and an allergic reaction) inevitably ensues. 7) The Last Battle - The Waist Whittle
- A gripping, coming of age tale about a woman who joins weight watchers only to watch the pounds fall off and the attention pile on. (Many) Love Affairs inevitably ensue.

So there you have it - this new series is not to be missed. It's best to picture these covers with Fabio-like characters gracing the paperback coverlets (that fold out for greater detail).