News You Can Use:

Along with a couple of cigarettes, a latte from Au Bon Pain, and a lateral job move – things are on the up-and-up at Shangri La.

I’m happy to report that my finger that I got jammed in the back of a chair on a date with a certain software writing Irishman has healed nicely. The index finger on my dominant (read: LEFT) hand is a little tender to the touch but otherwise in working order. I had a bit of a scare after a nasty infection left it puffy and hurting. Thus causing me to take anti-biotics for a week to cure the raging infection. This begs the question below:

Question of the day: Do they sell shirts that say – I Went On A Date With An Irishman And All I Got Was This Lousy Infected Finger??

I’m getting a new roommate. She moves in on 5/01. Good thing too as this is day 27 of unwanted houseguestville… Talk about roommate’s taking advantage. Oh well, f**k her. She’s going to Spain in a few months. I think an ocean separating us will be a good thing.

Choline/Inositol and B-12 are the latest supplements I’ve been adding to my diet. I was informed these act as mood stabilizers – and while I could have easily gotten Paxil or Welbutrin from the shrink I went to visit a few weeks ago, I prefer to take the natural route first. Although, I find for a lot of New Yorkers, it’s very natural to take mood stabilizing medication….

While I’ve been encouraged by one of my parents not to be discouraged or beat myself up because I could have done something better, I can’t help but notice that I’m an abysmal failure when it comes to dealings with the less-fair sex. For a long time I’ve been considering translating these endeavors (read: FAILURES) into a bestseller. With the financial rewards from my best seller, I plan to buy a house on a canal in Holland. Maybe even a windmill. I will make cheese out of this windmill. Perhaps I will sell it with the following promotional: GOUDA NUFF FOR ME GOUDA NUFF FOR YOU!